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“A most absurd theory—that the Seven Spirits in Nandowin were in fact from an Atlantis somewhere off the coast of Vinland [Newfoundland]! Such folly! When everyone *knows* Atlantis was in Jersey.” —Raphaël Peletier, on the recent presentation at the Royal Society of France by Moïse Gaudin, January 8, 1901 “Let’s make ourselves a deal, shall we? You want support for your new invention, this ‘ramjet cannon’, from the Gejigunese [Hispaniolan] government. Well, that’s easy enough. You provide me with the exclusives. I’ll start you the war.” —Cholhkun Who Fosters, editor and manager of The Sugarcane Chronicles, to Proconsul Zan Dimaa of Mawana [Azua, Dominican Republic], February 28, 1901 “The Brazilian obsession with neyball [from Guaraní ñeha’a] is no different than the French obsession with soule [rugby-esque], or the ulama [Mesoamerican ballgame] competitions between Mexico, Mayab, Huaxyacac, and Judah which—a Good Answer at last—seem to have replaced warfare with something far more

“I advise only this: that the words be transmitted so as to be best understood. The phonetic system of Gameen [eastern+central Canada] is well enough, but they lack the subtle nuance of the Trade Signs, being preferable only among the Bii’weg and those who would abandon their languages for that of their apparent superiors. No, if there is to be a telegraph code along the Great River, it must remain the Air-Song, by which a simple set of binary numbers is used to encode symbols from the Trade Signs. It will save time and energy—and effort besides, as all from one end of the continent to the other are familiar with the Trade Signs even if they speak no other language.” —wíngyangkaya [technician] Yašléločhíng of Ósmakakšíng [Evansville, Indiana], 1891 “The Muslims in court have formed a bloc of sorts, the Hindustani Loyalists. They are campaigning for further integration of Hodu into Britain while at the same time wishing to grant it further freedoms—a second Brasil, I have heard it

“There are subtleties to the Mystery that your language misses out on. Memaajitaagozing and Nesidotaagozid, the ‘Good Answer’ and the ‘Bad Answer’ as you call them. One made bees, one made mosquitos. One made the Sun and Moon and Stars, and equal temperature; the other made heat enough to burn and cold enough to freeze. One gives solutions to problems, the other reiterates them. Your confusion is warranted. “But that is not the whole. “Memaajitaagozing does not merely provide resources; it seeks out change in the universe, a reshaping of matter and thought. It can tell you what to do in order to alter your own fate. Nesidotaagozid does not provide solutions; instead, it says, ‘This is how things are. Do not expect to change them.’ It reminds us that we cannot control all the universe—that we must at times accept that, and be content, and not seek to make life worse for ourselves and others by the recklessness Memaajitaagozing might inspire within us. Nesidotaagozid reminds us to be

“One last time. One last chance. Either Carnatia [Granada] falls, or we accept that Iberia itself has truly fallen forever, and will never reunite.” —General Chuaquín Esnarrizaga of Aragon, on the eve of the Last Iberian Crusade, 1871 “Madness and stupidity. What fool would honestly think it possible to take back a land after centuries of occupation? The Carnatians [Granadans] have lived in Iberia for over a thousand years, and now the Spanish and Aragonese are trying to remove them in the name of, what? Anti-colonist sentiment? You may as well try to get rid of the Japanese from Kingawa, or the Mongols from Poland and Cathay, or the British from Brazil, or indeed the Spanish from Mexico. Of course, if someone would please let us have Jerusalem back we’d be very grateful, but you don’t see us going out to beat up those poor defenceless Assyrians [Iraqis] to get it. At some point, the lease runs out. Trying to change that sets a dangerous precedent.” —Rabbi Ephrem Reinharz of Berlin

“The Emperor of the Isles [Japan] has risen up against the shogunate that has for so long treated him, his family, and the people as little more than puppets. The shogunate has risen up against the plot by the Emperor to return the Isles to his own personal fief. And we, the people of Kingawa, are being forbidden from interfering in the affairs of ‘true patriots’—not we who have ‘abandoned our lands’. “To which I say—shinjimae. If we want to join in, like all hells are you going to stop us.” —shōshō [Regent] Hachisuka Nobunaga of Kingawa, on the Japanese Civil War, 1861 “From a black bean, white gold.” —Özdemir tabbah [cook], founder of Sultani Itimiller, the first milk chocolate manufacturers in Europe, 1861 “Muwekma [Ohlone] sailors report that Japan has descended into civil war, that their tuuk-thēya [emperor] battles his lords, and that the people of Kingawa have chosen to aid his lords against him. It is little concern of ours what they do there—but I fear for repercussions